Picking A New Favorite Team

Well the Flyers season ended Tuesday night at 9:36. So you may as well pick a new favorite team.
Here’s a guide to some of your closest geographic choices.
New Jersey Devils
Pros: Short drive up the Turnpike. Hall of Fame goaltender and exciting offense plus defensive responsibility. Plenty of good seats still available. Have more to talk to Dowell about.
Cons: They’re the Devils. One day Brodeur will retire and it will all be over. They’re moving to Newark. Face painters.
New York Rangers
Pros: Mike Richter was a Ranger and he played at Wissahickon. You secretly were happy when they won in 1994. You want to chant 1975 at a certain divisional rival.
Cons: Rangers Fans. Jaromir Jagr.
Washington Capitals
Pros: Alexander Ovechkin. No one can accuse you of front-running. Easily accessible home games via Amtrak.
Cons: Traveling to games via Amtrak. No one from Washington is a Caps fan, why should you be one?
New York Islanders
Pros: Owner may ask you to be GM. Long term contract makes you confident in buying DiPietro jersey.
Cons: Garth Snow is GM. They play on Long Island.
PIttsburgh Penguins
Pros: Crosby and Malkin guarantee highlights. New arena likely to be in a casino. You already play for the Penguins.
Cons: Rubbing elbows with Steelers fans. The mills closed.
Buffalo Sabres
Pros: Came within one game of the Stanley Cup Finals and return the same core. Won 9-1 in their last game. Play exciting wide-open hockey. Traditional hockey market with a loyal fan base. A real feel-good story.
Cons: Snow, and lots of it. That stupid new logo.

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7 Responses to Picking A New Favorite Team

  1. thegoatsbro says:

    Now now.. The Fly boys just need to fire Clarke and Suck real bad for a couple of years in order to get a few #1 picks like the Caps and Pens. No need to jump off bridges or become fn devils fans. Myself, I will not watch the eagles or flyers for the next two years till they are rebuilding with some talent. Richardson, Carter Fuck I held that Calder Cup over my head and neither of those pussies had the balls to take it back from me. How many days till the Phils start again Bern?

  2. turk says:

    If the “mills are closed” comment wasn’t so true, i’d be pissed. but, i’m a pens fan before football season is over.

  3. Dr. Bumba says:

    I agree with Goatsbro, Bernie, when do the Phillies start?

  4. fiyah says:

    pitchers and catchers start in early February. Anybody want to make a trip to Clearwater? L.A. sez the tiki bar beer is always cold. Who would have thought that the Phils might be the team to break the ’83 streak…..if they get Soriano? Holy shit. It’s a shame that Forsberg’s time here will be a waste….but i agree with you goatsbro. And i’m not a big fan of this new NHL, haven’t seen one fight yet. No balls last night….when you are losing 9-1 it’s time to “send in the goons.” J.Cheyney

  5. Dr. Bumba says:

    C’mon Bernie, they have team toughness. Did you see Knuble get a minor for roughing when Peters drilled Forsberg. They showed Boyd Kane on the bench and it looked like he was crapping his pants knowing that he was the one who would have to go after Peters. I forget their slogan this year, can someone remind me.
    It is also obvious that you don’t need an enforecer on your team in the new NHL, just look at Buffalo’s 4th line.

  6. Art says:

    I almost felt bad about the mill reference. Such a stereotype. But since I have to live with booing Santa Claus (it happened in the Sixties), I figured screw it.

  7. Its always Sunny in Philadelphia says:

    You guys sound like a bunch of girls. Its like you actually think that the Flyers will lose out the rest of the way. The message I bring home from last night is that no NHL team should ever be beat like that. Losing like that has nothing to do with skill and everything to do with playing hard, playing smart, and playing with confidence( all Hitchcocks Job). Tha being said, the Flyers certainly need to makes a move or two to pick up the spead on the back end. But the Flyers offense will absolutely come around. There is too much talent (7 20+ goal scorers from last year)not to produce. As with all sports, defense wins. Hockey is no different. Hitchcock needs to get everyone to play good tight team defense or he will be gone by November. Play the young guys that want to compete, find replacements for Hatcher and Rathje and leave the goddamn lines together for a few shifts.

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