This Week's Sign of the Apocalypse

051806news.jpgLorena Who? This woman used her bare hands to rip up her man’s junk!

The Nicetown man said he had been sleeping peacefully in the couple’s bed Tuesday night when his wife pounced on him without warning, grabbed his groin, dug her manicured fingernails in and flayed him, leaving his gore-slicked gonads dangling much lower than normal.
“She didn’t use no weapon – this was just sheer brute strength and fingernails. She grabbed me by my [scrotum] and ripped it apart with her bare hands,” Randolph said yesterday from his hospital bed at Albert Einstein Medical Center, where he was in stable condition with stitched and bandaged genitals. […]
Talk about a strict violation of the penal code.
Howard Randolph said his wife tore “everything out of the sac and all the skin away.”
Just the thought triggers most men to hunch over and wince, but Randolph said he felt “fine” yesterday thanks to the morphine that doctors administered.

A Genital Reminder

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2 Responses to This Week's Sign of the Apocalypse

  1. Dr. Bumba says:

    That will be the photo of Chris Curci after the baby shower on Sunday.

  2. kd says:

    Yeah but it sounds like that might be the story of B+ if he doesn’t go to the shower on Sunday.

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