Odds Long for Philadelphia Man in Mini-triathalon

Posted on August 5, 2005 by Arthur

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Las Vegas – Vegas oddsmakers today announce that Mark Jenkins, owner of the local Kensington Horsehoes plant, is a 400-1 shot for winning the mini-triathalon at the shore saturday.
Mark didn’t seem too down about that. “I learned how to swim when I was a kid. Biking, too. And I like to run from the cops occasionally, so I feel good.”
What Jenkins doesn’t feel good about are his odds of suffering myocardialinfarction, or a heart attack.
Sports Radio 610 this mornining reported that oddsmakers are taking 3 to 1 odds that Jenkins has a heart attack and dies during the swim.
“that’s been a concern of mine,” said Jenkins from his make-shift office, “ever since I started training in Montreal this past April.”
For anyone wanting to wish Markus good will or ill, details for the triathlon are here (I think).

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7 Responses to Odds Long for Philadelphia Man in Mini-triathalon

  1. Tyrone Bootzpatrick says:
    August 5, 2005 at 12:45 pm

    That was brilliant.
    “You know, your son looks like a fag to me. You better get married again or he’s going to wind up with somebody’s cock in his mouth faster than you can say Jackie Robinson.”

  2. Kevin says:
    August 5, 2005 at 4:40 pm

    WHO DIDN’T PAY???

  3. bern says:
    August 6, 2005 at 2:26 am

    bwahaaah!

  4. Art says:
    August 8, 2005 at 5:00 pm

    Any word from Jenkins?
    I don’t see him in the results.
    http://www.compuscore.com/cs2005/aug/brigtri.htm

  5. Bumba says:
    August 8, 2005 at 6:15 pm

    Perfect!!!

  6. goat says:
    August 9, 2005 at 9:39 am

    He drowned the night before in beer and cum.

  7. Kevin says:
    August 10, 2005 at 9:17 am

    …the cum being what ultimately did him in.

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