ALDO Store Suffers from Z-daldo Name Change

aldo_sign.jpgNEW YORK – It’s the holiday season, but sales are down at ALDO in New York City resulting from the company’s model/owner/one-man-brand named Z-daldo (formerly Aldo).
Analysts at Morgan Stanley have downgraded the retail empire’s stock, mainly because demand has ceased for Aldo merchandise.
“I don’t understand,” said a dazed and confused Z-daldo from his corporate jet. “I’m still me. I’m still really tall. Really handsome. And it’s still really really really hard to get the puck through my feet. Why won’t people by my stuff?”
The reason, cited by passersby on East Broad Street, is simple. “Aldo is out,” surveys say. “Z-daldo is in.” And right now, sign factories and clothing tag manufactures everywhere are in a frenzy working to add the new “Z-d” to store frontage and clothing tags.
“I am really worried,” added Z-daldo now in his limo rocketing toward Wintersport Ice Arena where he’s a star in the Mens Cup League. “Other stores in my empire, mostly Z-dildo which I’ve named endearingly after my brother, are going to suffer too.”
Z-dildo sales have always lagged behind those of Z-daldo, but both stores could be in peril sources say on condition of anonymity. Although Z-dildo stock may be rising with his recent performance for little-known Murphy’s.
“What have I done?” wondered Z-daldo aloud.

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